"I talked to Barsik today," said koshka Murka.
"What did he say?" I was super excited, and would have jumped, if my crooked little sausage legs were of any use at all.
"He said he met many children who were still able to use All-knowing at an unusually late age."
"How?"
"They were deaf and mute, meaning - they couldn't hear or talk."
"That's just great!" I attempted to bang my head on the pillow, rather unsuccessfully.
Murka rounded her green eyes compassionately, as only she could do,
"He said there is hope. He is going to do some research, but for now, he said, the longer you delay learning the human language, the better."
"Okay, I can do that."
"He said he'll talk about your problem to an even older and wiser cat Chowmein. He will get back to me on that."
Babushka came in. She picked me up, "Nu shto? Poidyom gulyatj?"
She wanted to take me outside for a walk.
Babushka started to roll me into a blanket, saying, "Na ulize holodno. Zima. Nado tjeplo odjetsya."
She finished by pulling over my head an itchy woolen hat with a huge pink pompon.
"Nu vot, mi gotovi, poshli."
Outside, babushka kept on showing me things and naming them, as she walked. I did my best not to pay attention, minding Barsik's advice.
"Smotri, smotri," babushka pointed to a little dog, "sobachka."
I said hello to sobachka, and she got up on her hind legs and barked. I mean, the humans thought she barked, but what she really was saying was, "Don't talk to me! You, you cat lover! I can smell them all over you!"
I asked, "What do you have against cats?"
But sobachka was being quickly dragged away by a huge human female with calves bigger around than the dog was.
"Smotri," babushka pointed to a tree, "Eto derevo. Topolj."
I said, "hello Topolj," to the tree. It was a friendly tree, nothing like Yolka.
It responded politely, "Hello little human pup. Please feel free to pee on me."
"Thank you, but not today. I'm all wrapped. Maybe some other time."
"Look forward to it. Nice talking to you."
"Smotri, smotry!" babushka got excited, pointing at a window, "Igrushechniy magazin!"
We went inside. Shelves along the walls contained many toys, but I wasn't interested. Babushka pointed her finger to a tiny gray toy, "Eto mishka." The word caught my attention. Murka mentioned hunting and eating mishei. So that's what one of them looks like. Cute. So Murka says they are tasty, let's see. I grabbed mishku, stuck its head in my mouth and began sucking on it. Not bad! Babushka went to a cashier to pay for it. The cashier was quite angry with babushka, because, apparently, she was supposed to pay first, get a paper ticket, then walk over to the shelf, give the ticket to the cashier, who'd get us the mouse. It was really my bad, not babushka's. I took the toy out of my mouth and tried to hand it to the lady, so she could follow the procedure, but she wrinkled her lumpy potato nose and let us get away with the impropriety.
"Spasibo," said babushka to the cashier and we left the store.
Babushka insisted on teaching me stuff:
"Vot machina. (It's a car) Smotri, (look) ona pojehala (it drove). Machini edut (cars drive)."
I had enough of forced language lessons. I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep so good, I actually fell asleep.
Back at home I told Murka, "I met another animal today - sobachka, and she called me a cat lover. She sounded like it was a bad thing."
Murka squinted her eyes in disgust, "Dogs envy us cats."
"Why?"
"They are pathetically codependent. They can't imagine thinking for themselves. If a human throws a stick, they run to get it, even if the stick lands in the mud or in the water. No self-respecting cat would ever do that!"
______________________________
edjet - he/she drives, rides; edut - they drive, ride
gulyatj - to go for a walk, to go outside
igrushka - a toy
igrushechniy magazin - a toy store
mishka - a mouse
nado - it needs, you need, we need
Nu shto? - what's up?
Nu vot - okay
machina - car, machini - cars
ona pojehala - she (the car) started driving
mi gotovi - we are ready
odetsya - to get dressed
poidyom - let's go
poshli - let's go right now
smotri - look
sobachka - a cute little dog, sobaka - a dog
spasibo - thank you
uliza - street, na ulize - on the street, outside
tjeplo- warm
zima - winter
"What did he say?" I was super excited, and would have jumped, if my crooked little sausage legs were of any use at all.
"He said he met many children who were still able to use All-knowing at an unusually late age."
"How?"
"They were deaf and mute, meaning - they couldn't hear or talk."
"That's just great!" I attempted to bang my head on the pillow, rather unsuccessfully.
Murka rounded her green eyes compassionately, as only she could do,
"He said there is hope. He is going to do some research, but for now, he said, the longer you delay learning the human language, the better."
"Okay, I can do that."
"He said he'll talk about your problem to an even older and wiser cat Chowmein. He will get back to me on that."
Babushka came in. She picked me up, "Nu shto? Poidyom gulyatj?"
She wanted to take me outside for a walk.
Babushka started to roll me into a blanket, saying, "Na ulize holodno. Zima. Nado tjeplo odjetsya."
She finished by pulling over my head an itchy woolen hat with a huge pink pompon.
"Nu vot, mi gotovi, poshli."
Outside, babushka kept on showing me things and naming them, as she walked. I did my best not to pay attention, minding Barsik's advice.
"Smotri, smotri," babushka pointed to a little dog, "sobachka."
I said hello to sobachka, and she got up on her hind legs and barked. I mean, the humans thought she barked, but what she really was saying was, "Don't talk to me! You, you cat lover! I can smell them all over you!"
I asked, "What do you have against cats?"
But sobachka was being quickly dragged away by a huge human female with calves bigger around than the dog was.
"Smotri," babushka pointed to a tree, "Eto derevo. Topolj."
I said, "hello Topolj," to the tree. It was a friendly tree, nothing like Yolka.
It responded politely, "Hello little human pup. Please feel free to pee on me."
"Thank you, but not today. I'm all wrapped. Maybe some other time."
"Look forward to it. Nice talking to you."
"Smotri, smotry!" babushka got excited, pointing at a window, "Igrushechniy magazin!"
We went inside. Shelves along the walls contained many toys, but I wasn't interested. Babushka pointed her finger to a tiny gray toy, "Eto mishka." The word caught my attention. Murka mentioned hunting and eating mishei. So that's what one of them looks like. Cute. So Murka says they are tasty, let's see. I grabbed mishku, stuck its head in my mouth and began sucking on it. Not bad! Babushka went to a cashier to pay for it. The cashier was quite angry with babushka, because, apparently, she was supposed to pay first, get a paper ticket, then walk over to the shelf, give the ticket to the cashier, who'd get us the mouse. It was really my bad, not babushka's. I took the toy out of my mouth and tried to hand it to the lady, so she could follow the procedure, but she wrinkled her lumpy potato nose and let us get away with the impropriety.
"Spasibo," said babushka to the cashier and we left the store.
Babushka insisted on teaching me stuff:
"Vot machina. (It's a car) Smotri, (look) ona pojehala (it drove). Machini edut (cars drive)."
I had enough of forced language lessons. I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep so good, I actually fell asleep.
Back at home I told Murka, "I met another animal today - sobachka, and she called me a cat lover. She sounded like it was a bad thing."
Murka squinted her eyes in disgust, "Dogs envy us cats."
"Why?"
"They are pathetically codependent. They can't imagine thinking for themselves. If a human throws a stick, they run to get it, even if the stick lands in the mud or in the water. No self-respecting cat would ever do that!"
______________________________
edjet - he/she drives, rides; edut - they drive, ride
gulyatj - to go for a walk, to go outside
igrushka - a toy
igrushechniy magazin - a toy store
mishka - a mouse
nado - it needs, you need, we need
Nu shto? - what's up?
Nu vot - okay
machina - car, machini - cars
ona pojehala - she (the car) started driving
mi gotovi - we are ready
odetsya - to get dressed
poidyom - let's go
poshli - let's go right now
smotri - look
sobachka - a cute little dog, sobaka - a dog
spasibo - thank you
uliza - street, na ulize - on the street, outside
tjeplo- warm
zima - winter
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